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Growing up, my family was considered unconventional. I had step-parents and siblings, and half brothers due to my parents having been married before. Now this was in the 70s and 80s. I didn't know it then, it was normal for me. I never thought what it would be like to have my parent always together. Heck! I didn't want that. My dad was abusive to my mother and an alcoholic. Sad thing is that he never did admit to it. My younger brother and I would try to spend some time with him in the summer but he would only spend the first day sober, after that we would fear for our lives. No, he was not physically abusive to us, but he would threatened to disown us if we didn't live with him, drive through a busy town on the weekends drunk while we would ride in the back of the truck, hunkered down praying that we make it home safe. Usually the next day we would call out mother to pick us up, or have dad take us back home.
I had step mothers, who I referred to as Dad's wives. I never referred them as a step parent. Some only stuck around a few months. However the last one lasted over 20 years.
I had only one step dad. He took the responsibility of helping my mother raise two kiddos. He was great with my brother. He took him as his own son. My brother needed a positive male role model such as him. The went everywhere together. I am happy that my brother had that. With me, he never did treat me as an equal with his own daughter. He made her set down and do nothing, while he told my mother to have to clean up after her. I am not making that up. My mother didn't want to cause backlash on this one, agreed. While I was younger, they fought like cats and dogs over us. Even separating for a few weeks. She left him on my birthday. Yea, that was not a good birthday. Matter of fact, I didn't have too many good birthdays growing up in that house. My mother told me to just keep quiet about it to keep the peace. As I got older and grew up into a woman, he attempted to do things that should not have happened. I really had a difficulty time in trusting men. It's a wonder I even married. More about that later.
Now, I have two kids of my own and a stepdaughter who live 8 hours away. She has three kiddos, one whom we've not seen. Our work schedules are so odd that we are lucky to even get to message each other. I've been married to my college sweetheart for almost 28 years. In my family that is a record. But, recently we've almost not made it. He has threatened to kick my out a couple of times, but I'm not going anywhere. It was due to the devil. He has been using me as a tool against everything I believe in. He has been presenting opportunities in a way where I thought it was God, placing me in more danger that I could not see. Now he is putting some negative thoughts and feelings in my head. I know that it is not God's work, I know that it is not God's well. Satan has been using my depression against me and against those I love.
Oh, I said the D word, Depression. Yes, it is real. No, it is not just something that you can shake yourself out of. It is a chemical imbalance that affects all your aspects of life. Your work, family, sleep, hobbies if you have any or use to have any, eating. Yes, there are pills for that, but you and your doctor has got to find the right one. You've got so speak up and talk to your doctor. I've been fighting it for a while and have been on medication for it for about 2 years. With my stressful job, taking master classes, having the loss of my mother after a short illness and my in-laws in a near fatal accident, I thought I was going to go crazy. I just wanted to hide. I know a lot of how brain chemicals work and how feelings and the brain heals itself. That is part of my job as a special education teacher, specializing in autism and behavior disorders. My brain has been through a lot of turmoil situations and was having a hard time in processing. I still have control over my emotions and my being, by my brain was hurting. The chemicals was going crazy and I was not able to recover from it, it was more than the 'blues'. It does help keep my blood pressure down as well.
This is my first full week of summer break. I have so much on my to-do-list that I had better get started on it. We are expecting our first grandchild together in October. I have a spare bedroom that I've got to get cleaned out and ready. I know that it is May, and I have five months, but this bedroom is really bad. I should post a picture on how bad it is. I may do that later today. I try to keep my house clean and in order, however I feel some stress relieve if I have a bedroom where I can keep the door shut. It is my junk room. It is really no junk, just extra clothes and what ever I don't want to put up then, just gets thrown in there. It give me a little stress relieve to just junk it up. I know it sounds crazy, but I can just let it go in there. Now, I've got to get it all put up and away. That means a lot of trips to the Gospel Mission to give away and get rid of junk that in there. I can do that.
OH, and it is Memorial Day. I can't forget that. Not for the official start of summer, but because we live in the best country in the world. Even if our politics is questionable, we have services that other countries do not have. We have the freedom of religion and of speech. Can you imagine not being able to worship the way you want, or not worshiping the way you want?
Patriotism is supporting your country all the time, and your government when it deserves it. Mark Twain
Read more at: http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/m/marktwain386139.html?src=t_memorialday
I had step mothers, who I referred to as Dad's wives. I never referred them as a step parent. Some only stuck around a few months. However the last one lasted over 20 years.
I had only one step dad. He took the responsibility of helping my mother raise two kiddos. He was great with my brother. He took him as his own son. My brother needed a positive male role model such as him. The went everywhere together. I am happy that my brother had that. With me, he never did treat me as an equal with his own daughter. He made her set down and do nothing, while he told my mother to have to clean up after her. I am not making that up. My mother didn't want to cause backlash on this one, agreed. While I was younger, they fought like cats and dogs over us. Even separating for a few weeks. She left him on my birthday. Yea, that was not a good birthday. Matter of fact, I didn't have too many good birthdays growing up in that house. My mother told me to just keep quiet about it to keep the peace. As I got older and grew up into a woman, he attempted to do things that should not have happened. I really had a difficulty time in trusting men. It's a wonder I even married. More about that later.
Now, I have two kids of my own and a stepdaughter who live 8 hours away. She has three kiddos, one whom we've not seen. Our work schedules are so odd that we are lucky to even get to message each other. I've been married to my college sweetheart for almost 28 years. In my family that is a record. But, recently we've almost not made it. He has threatened to kick my out a couple of times, but I'm not going anywhere. It was due to the devil. He has been using me as a tool against everything I believe in. He has been presenting opportunities in a way where I thought it was God, placing me in more danger that I could not see. Now he is putting some negative thoughts and feelings in my head. I know that it is not God's work, I know that it is not God's well. Satan has been using my depression against me and against those I love.
Oh, I said the D word, Depression. Yes, it is real. No, it is not just something that you can shake yourself out of. It is a chemical imbalance that affects all your aspects of life. Your work, family, sleep, hobbies if you have any or use to have any, eating. Yes, there are pills for that, but you and your doctor has got to find the right one. You've got so speak up and talk to your doctor. I've been fighting it for a while and have been on medication for it for about 2 years. With my stressful job, taking master classes, having the loss of my mother after a short illness and my in-laws in a near fatal accident, I thought I was going to go crazy. I just wanted to hide. I know a lot of how brain chemicals work and how feelings and the brain heals itself. That is part of my job as a special education teacher, specializing in autism and behavior disorders. My brain has been through a lot of turmoil situations and was having a hard time in processing. I still have control over my emotions and my being, by my brain was hurting. The chemicals was going crazy and I was not able to recover from it, it was more than the 'blues'. It does help keep my blood pressure down as well.
This is my first full week of summer break. I have so much on my to-do-list that I had better get started on it. We are expecting our first grandchild together in October. I have a spare bedroom that I've got to get cleaned out and ready. I know that it is May, and I have five months, but this bedroom is really bad. I should post a picture on how bad it is. I may do that later today. I try to keep my house clean and in order, however I feel some stress relieve if I have a bedroom where I can keep the door shut. It is my junk room. It is really no junk, just extra clothes and what ever I don't want to put up then, just gets thrown in there. It give me a little stress relieve to just junk it up. I know it sounds crazy, but I can just let it go in there. Now, I've got to get it all put up and away. That means a lot of trips to the Gospel Mission to give away and get rid of junk that in there. I can do that.
OH, and it is Memorial Day. I can't forget that. Not for the official start of summer, but because we live in the best country in the world. Even if our politics is questionable, we have services that other countries do not have. We have the freedom of religion and of speech. Can you imagine not being able to worship the way you want, or not worshiping the way you want?
Patriotism is supporting your country all the time, and your government when it deserves it. Mark Twain
Read more at: http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/m/marktwain386139.html?src=t_memorialday
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